*not an usual post, just expressing some feelings*
It’s been a while since I wrote something here, that’s for sure. I am done! I have missed writing and now I feel like I don’t have creativity anymore, ha ha. It’s my little corner of recreation, but I will think about some new content. The good news is that I am DONE with my bachelor degree, I graduated “for real” this time. Yesterday (07 July) I received my official documents saying that I have graduate with a very good grade I would say.
It has been an intense month, filled with exams and thesis presentation and finalizing my departure from this country. I still have some work to do regarding paperwork and also I have to go to do my passport, but I am happy! A chapter in my life has finished and I am SO happy that it’s done, now I can focus on my next challenge.
WHEN IT’S ALL SAID AND DONE!
I finished! I can’t believe it’s finished, I have dreamed about this moment since I was 14 years old. I don’t want to get into politics, but the educational system here is so bad. Although, I am somewhat grateful for the experiences I’ve had, maybe if I didn’t have those I wouldn’t be the person I am today, but I am so grateful and happy that I’m moving to another country.
Since I went for the first with Erasmus+ to that internship, I knew that after I will finish my bachelor here I would definitely move. I saw another system, not only educational, but also the society is so much more… like me (I don’t know how to say it), I feel like I belong there.
Last year, after a tremendously research and notes taken I decided I want to apply for the master there and so the work began. I searched for the master that most appealed to me, that thing you know for sure you would love to study. Because I started early with my research about masters, I applied in October and I believe I was among the first one to apply, haha. I was so excited I couldn’t wait since I had almost all the documents ready. I had to do two things at the same time, study two different things at the same time. The other thing was for the bachelor thesis and exams.
I started taking English classes, because is not my first language and I needed proof of my language proficiency. Had to study all those tips and tricks about this exam and how to get a good grade. Luckily for me I had the best professor out there and I thank her everyday. While I was in the car with my friend at McDonald’s Drive through, this was in April or so, I received an email from the University saying that I was accepted at the masters program for which I applied, in that moment I cried so hard couldn’t control myself. That gave me more motivation to continue.
After that, I went through a tough period… I started doing mistakes in my English tests and should not have done it at that time, I thought I wouldn’t pass and I had a mental breakdown, started crying and basically bullied myself for not being good enough. I cried and cried, and cried all over again, until I started pushing people away from me, but my boyfriend and my two best friends supported me all the way. I didn’t want to get out of the house, because I thought I should be doing tests all the time, to become better you know, but that got me in that situation, so my friends got me out of the house. They would take me anywhere, just to be out of the house and away from study for some time. I thank them and I am so grateful to have them!! Love you guys!!
After that I gathered myself up, and started thinking why I started in the first place, and then I recovered! I started pouring my soul into those tests to take that exam. Because, basically even though I was accepted, without that test result I couldn’t go, my English proficiency would not be good enough. I am not going to lie by the end I was so sick of it, I wanted to finish faster with it. I did it though, took my exam and send them the results. I felt SO GOOD!! I was so damn proud of myself.
Last week I had my bachelor exam and oral presentation of my thesis. GRADUATED! Now I just wait for these weeks to pass by so I can finally leave and start doing what I said I would do.
In high school I made the mistake of telling my dreams to someone I thought they would understand and support me. That person said to me that I would never do this, that it is impossible for me to do this, there are other people more prepared than me. And it is true, but I became determined and said that at some point I would leave to study in another country. Well, here I am, more ready than ever!! Never, ever doubt yourself or your thoughts! They are a powerful weapon!
Would you like to read more about my moving experience? And also write about the master?